Branch Covidian Advent Calendar, 19 Dec. 2023
Finally, '4-in-1 Tests for Covid, the Flu, RSV' are available
Give in to your inner Covidian at any time, now for only 89 Norwegian Crowns—approx. US$ 8-9—and there’s ‘free shipping’ for those who buy stuff in excess of 499 Norwegian Crowns (only in Norway, though).
It’s also a great option if you don’t have a Christmas present for your hypochondriac loved ones who still wear face-diapers (should they have you).
Yes, for the sake of completeness, Assistant Health Director Espen Nakstad cautions against these home tests, but there’s more ‘phun’ to be had elsewhere.
As you may imagine, dropping these things onto ‘the market’ isn’t exactly new news, and to prove my point, I shall provide you with a few lines from an old news item that appeared about a year ago.
Self-Testing at Home: 4-in-1 Test for Covid, the Flu, RSV
Germany continues to groan under the wave of illness caused by coronavirus, influenza and RSV infections—the symptoms of respiratory infections are similar. How do infected people know what they are suffering from? A combined test aims to recognise four pathogens simultaneously.
By Katrin Klaus, Bayerischer Rundfunk, 22/28 Dec. 2022 [source]
Since December, there has been a 4-in-1 test for home use that is designed to detect coronavirus, influenza and respiratory syncytial virus (RSV). It is marketed by a Hamburg-based company that had already offered a lateral flow PCR test during the first coronavirus wave. The 4-in-1 test is said to be able to recognise four pathogens simultaneously—and as a self-test for home use. All you need to do is insert a swab into both nostrils, stir it a few times in the test liquid, then put a few drops on the cassette, wait 15 minutes and you're done—just like a conventional coronavirus self-test. [talk about predictive programming with the Covid ‘tests’]
The advantage is that patients can quickly find out which respiratory infection they are suffering from...According to the manufacturer, the sensitivity and accuracy of the test are ‘very high’, however, they are based on a study conducted by the company itself, which was quite small with less than a hundred participants. The test has not yet been independently analysed by the Paul Ehrlich Institute, as is the case with many other rapid coronavirus tests. [oh, look, 99+ percent sensitivity, according to the manufacturer; no independent verification by the regulator, although, to be fair, it’s hard to say if the latter is a plus…]
It is difficult to assess, however, how well this 4-in-1 test works, as the data is relatively thin...[that must be the understatement of that day…]
One must also not forget that rapid tests can also be false-negative, i.e., infected people think they are safe and think they are not ill, even though they are.
Or worse: they think they are not contagious. Ultimately, anyone who coughs and sneezes is very likely to be contagious—with or without a test—and should take care of themselves and the people around them. In other words, it's better to stay at home and cure yourself in peace or, if you have severe symptoms, go to a doctor and get tested and advised.
Bottom Lines
Do these things still qualify as ‘hypochondria’? I suppose it’s more like whatever kind of mental illness.
Still, we’ve seen some bat-shit crazy stuff (pun intended), but the above is symptomatic (again) of the continued mental problems affecting esp. legacy media for pushing these lunacies.
Pomanders have more style and work better than the tests.
If they would add to test for insanity as a 5 in 1 it would actually be a good present for some….